Adjusting Your Wedding Expectations is Important

When you’re trying to save money, everything about a wedding needs to be planned carefully. There’s nothing wrong with being frugal, even though we live in a culture that really does try to get us to spend money at every turn. Weddings are a big tradition in many cultures, so a lot of people want to make sure that they have a great wedding. Yet that really doesn’t mean that it has to be a very big and expensive affair. It’s all about getting what you set out to do. It’s a celebration that can be anything you want it to be.

If you find that you really want to get things done quickly, then focusing on a smaller wedding is the key. Yet if you have your heart set on a big wedding that just won’t come, you need to adjust your wedding expectations. Make sure that you don´t forget about pre-wedding shot (example) when adjusting your plans.

You have to pick your battles. Do you really want to have a big wedding that you can’t afford, knowing that you’ll be paying that debt off for months to come? Even if your families offer to pay for the wedding, the truth is that you’re going to need to think about how that will affect them. Watching any loved one go into debt for your benefit just doesn’t feel too great.

Instead of getting frazzled, make sure that you plan things out in advance. Don’t think that it all has to fall on your shoulders. Make sure that you stop and get someone else to hear your perspective. Feel free to get as much help as possible in everything. A lot of people are probably standing around waiting to help you. But if you never ask, how will you ever know what they could do for you?

Saving money doesn’t have to be something painful. You just need to look at it from the right perspective. You could probably spend more than what you have readily available through the help of family and friends, but it would be better to give your family the gift of peace of mind. They are probably nervous that you’re getting married, so they will be looking for anything that feels stable. Why not reassure them that you really do have your focus in the right place? If you think about it, it just makes a lot more sense to save money and marry frugally than to splurge and end up bringing new stress into a new chapter of your life.

Adjusting your expectations can be difficult, but it’s often worth doing — even when it doesn’t seem that way at first. Try it out for yourself — you’ll see!

Revisiting Guest List Woes

If there’s one thing that gets a lot of couples that are getting ready to get married, it would be the guest list. Remember that when two people get together to get married, there are two sets of friends, two sets of parents, and two sets of grandparents. Of course, you have to also think of all of the friends that are connected to these people. They’re all going to want to be involved in some way in your wedding. Of course, budgets are tight, and resources can be limited. So you have to make sure that you really are thinking about how you will handle everyone without them getting angry with you. A lot of people can get hurt when it comes to getting left off a guest list. It’s important to make sure that you’re taking steps not to alienate people when they just want to be part of your life.

If you can’t have everyone for the wedding, giving out free CD’s with all of the photos is a good idea. You also want to make sure that you try to focus hard on getting some sort of “memory card” that people can save in their records to mark the event. If you make people feel included, then it won’t matter whether they are there or not.

When it comes to negative and destructive people, however, the only thing you can do is be firm. We have seen friends get married and allow negative people to come to the wedding. They would end up criticizing and commenting on everything that they didn’t like. Is that the environment you really want to have on one of the most important days of your life?

It’s up to you to create the type of wedding environment that you desire. Nobody can create it for you. You’re going to most likely have to stand up to people that aren’t necessarily good for you. If they cannot understand that it’s your wedding, you’re better off without them. They’re never going to be happy for you, and they can even go as far as to try to get you away from your spouse. Some people just don’t want to see you happy, but it’s not your fault. You have to move on with your life.

The key points to remember is that a guest list should be filled with people that are going to be happy and supportive of you on your big day. Avoid adding people that are just going to make the day miserable and drag on when it should be a pleasant time for everyone.

If you’re worried about people that are going to be disruptive when they are drunk, you will either need to make sure that you don’t serve alcohol, or that you cut these people from the guest list. It’s the same for anyone that has a lot of children that are going to be too small to be quiet during the event. Believe it or not, you can still stand up to a parent that doesn’t see why they have to leave their child at home. It’s going to be your wedding, on your terms — or nothing at all! Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

Break Wedding Rules…and Win!

If there’s one thing that you have to do when it comes time to plan for your wedding, you’re going to have to break the rules. That sounds really bold and almost a little terrifying, but it’s well worth it. You see, when you accept a bunch of rules into your life, you’re not necessarily going to be happier. Far too often when people get married, their parents try to run over them, making it hard to tell them no. On the other hand, even if your parents are laid back, you’ll probably find at least one friend that wants to try to run the whole show. It’s not their wedding — it’s yours. You’re going to need to make sure that you really are focusing on the big picture. This is just a celebration, since you are starting a new chapter in your life. It’s not going to be easy, but you might as well enjoy the adventures ahead. If you only focus on what everyone else expects you to do, then you’re bound to get disappointed sooner or later. Why not make sure that you’re able to really take care of yourself? If you aren’t thinking about what you want to get out of your wedding, you’re just going to find the whole ordeal very frustrating.

It’s better to stop and break all of the wedding rules that you don’t agree with. For example, let’s talk about dresses. Bold groupings of women now are choosing non-white wedding dresses to wear. Is that a right choice for everyone? not really — you will want to make sure that you are making the choice in dress based on your style. Nothing says that you can’t get married in a blue dress, or a tan dress, or even a bright red dress. It’s going to be up to you and what you feel comfortable with. Keep in mind that if you do end up going alternative, you’ll end up drawing some attention. Not all of it is necessarily going to be positive. Some people will feel that you’re really out of line for choosing an alternative dress.

What you need to do during the planning phase is to set boundaries. Let your friends and family know what’s up for discussion, and what isn’t. It’s your special day, so you have to make it count. Talk things over with your husband to be as well. There’s nothing that says that you have to keep everything bottled up within yourself. If other people are making you feel bad, tell them so. There’s nothing that says that you have to cater to everyone. If anything, this is the one day where everyone is supposed to cater to you.

You must make sure that you focus on breaking the “rules” that are holding you back. That’s not to say that you can’t keep other traditions. You just need to figure out how to pick your battles without alienating everyone. If you’re concerned about what people think, you need to decide how much that is worth to you. If you don’t think about that, then you’re not going to have the beautiful wedding you deserve. Good luck!